Name generator fun

Your fairy is called Gossamer Moonshimmer

She is the moon goddess's messenger.

She lives in spiderwebbed wonderlands and insect grottos.

She is only seen when the first flowers begin to blossom.

She wears tiny black spiders on her dresses. She has beautiful blue butterfly wings.

Get your free fairy name here!

The Great Archives determine you to have gone by the identity:
Angelique Spenser
Known in some parts of the world as:
Aphrodite of Beggars and Lepers
The Great Archives Record:
Amongst the lowest of the low you will find this one travelling.
Vampire Name Generator

Spiders and beggars and lepers, oh my!

And so I did it.

Yes, I did it. I posted every day in November, fulfilling the requirements for NaBloPoMo. Some of my last posts were a bit "meh", but I am proud that I did do it. Yay me!

Baby, it's cold outside

I know I live in the arctic tundra, but it has gotten really cold here. The wind is biting, too. The house feels chilly, even with the heat on, so I am snuggled in my winter housecoat and under a blanket. I realize it is almost December, but I am already tired of the cold.

I have also been feeling quite lazy lately. Been playing on Pogo a fair bit; it is a great time-waster. (No, this is not an ad) What can I say? Listening to tunes through the computer while playing video games is a sure way I can relax.

I think I am going to go and get a cup of tea, and snuggle up in front of the t.v. Sometimes (ok, a lot of the time) I just like to have a bit of R n' R.

Feeling snarky...

I was thinking of doing a post about gratitude. Don't get me wrong, I am blessed and have much to be grateful for. But there is a teeny little voice inside me saying: "I don't wanna be grateful! I wanna go shopping!" Ah, shopping. I used to love going shopping. Finding a cool *whatever* at a great price. Stopping for a snack. Just plain wandering around window-shopping. The last year has been quite tight since I have "been sick" and not working. My hubby has picked up the slack by working even harder.

I just get frustrated. I am tired. In some ways, I want the life I had "before" (to some extent). I know I am getting better. I am trying to get healthier. I am grateful just to have this chance.

The last hump-day of NaBloPoMo

Today is the last hump-day of NaBloPoMo. And for the first time for the whole month, I really don't have much to say. Went grocery shopping. Went to the dentist for a checkup. Made a pot roast and roast potatoes. Had a nap. Good Lord, do I ever live the high life!

I guess I just feel quiet and reflective and non-talkie. Hopefully, I will make a strong comeback and post some slightly more interesting things in the next few days!

Combining art and crochet

I did a bit of "brainstorming" on the weekend. Using the concept of crocheting on paper, I came up with this:



It is little, only 3"x4". Totally random and an exercise in layering colour and texture.

Thinking deeply

The past month or so has been kind of different. I feel like I am waking up after being asleep my whole life. Being asleep was not restful; it was that terror of feeling like you are falling punctuated by complete numbness. Even enjoyable things like holidays were terror-inducing. My inner world was one of constant self-doubt, self-hatred and unachievable perfectionism. I was the greatest actress; very few knew of my inner turmoil.

The last 18 months has been one of absolute exhaustion. The terror drained every bit of energy from me and I could do no more. I rested and slept. Just recently, I have realized I am not quite so exhausted. I have, for the first time, hope.

Doubt

Do you ever just wake up and be filled with doubt? Sometimes I think that all the "great ideas" that come to me while deep in thought are really just stupid. And maybe I am not really creative or talented. That maybe I am destined to live my life as a lump in front of the t.v., never to be productive or filled with energy. That the doubt is paralyzing me making me afraid to take a risk. I know I am rambling, but sometimes I just have to dump the crap in my brain somewhere, so that maybe there can be space for more positive thoughts.

Trying to find perspective...

I remember watching a program on t.v. about Lucian Freud, painter and grandson of Freud (yes THAT Freud). I love to see how "artists" work: their environment, their techniques, their passion. (I must qualify "artists". I feel anyone who is creative in anyway is an artist. Unfortunately, somehow I leave myself out of that label. I feel for Me to be an artist, I must slave diligently day after day on Art ie. painting or sculpture. Nevermind that I do many creative things; somehow I am never "good enough" or "dedicated enough" to be qualified as an "artist") (Ok, that had way too many quotation marks!). He painted Queen Elizabeth II, and I remember the uproar it caused.

I remember watching him paint these huge realistc portraitures that took literally a whole year to complete. It seemed to me that that was how I saw how *I* *should* be as an artist. But taking a whole year to paint a picture? I have never done anything everyday for a year (except breathe, eat, and do other basic functions). I am seriously impressed that I have posted every day in November, and I certainly would not call all my posts "deep" or "thought provoking" or even "interesting" (hello, post of this last Wednesday). I often get caught up in the *shoulds*, or *not enoughs* and get paralyzed. There is no way, I think to myself, that I can paint every day for a year (for years). And so I don't. Because in my brain, if I am not meeting some impossible standard for myself, then I just won't do it. And I am missing out. I love to create. I want to create. I just have to figure out how to be gentle enough with myself to be allowed to be an "artist".

A scarf for ME!

What can I say? It is a scarf. It is for me. So there.

Thursday is cold

Well, I guess winter is here. Winter is pretty, but I am not much for the cold. The snow from last week melted, but we got a little more of a dusting last night. Ice had made some beautiful patterns on our fence and gate, so of course I had to take some pics!





The snow stayed, but the ice melted in the sun...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A Happy Thanksgiving to our neighbors to the south...

Highbrow Humpday

Yup, having a highbrow kind of evening. Dinner is mac n' cheese (with extra cheese slices melted in) and manwich. Watching "Cops" on t.v. Dessert will be peaches and mandarin oranges out of a can. Yup. We're living the high life!

Random Think-age

A while ago, there was a big discussion about patterns and how to acquire them (buying them, photocopying from the library...) The library! Had totally forgotten about the library! So off I went, to see what I could find. A surprising number of books were out, but I found a couple titles that looked promising. I found one called The Crocheter's Art; New Dimensions in Free-Form Crochet by Del Pitt Feldman. Sounds perfect! So I went to get it, and found out it was written in 1972! (Nothing new under the sun, eh?) Definitely inspiring! She goes through how to make some basic flat and 3D forms, as well as incorporating different items in your crochet art. One idea that really piqued my interest was sewing a simple line of stitching on leather, and then using that as your base chain and crocheting right into that. This spurred an idea on in my head: incorporating crochet in my abstract art by crocheting right onto the canvas! The possibilities are endless... happy sigh

Homemade Snow

Ok, so they are not really snow, but snowflakes. I crocheted them out of #10 crochet cotton and a 1.5mm hook. The penny is almost 2cm in diameter.



After doing these two little guys, I am getting more used to working on such a small scale. Thanks go out to my hubby, who bought me a lighted magnifying glass so I could work on them. Hopefully, there will be more to come!

Whew! Made it!

After crocheting for a total of 20 hours in a consecutive 50 hour period, I finished the two scarves!

The first is a scarf made out of Bernat Bamboo in Corn. It is a lovely creamy colour. It is very soft and smooth; it has almost a "cool" feeling to it. It was super fast to crochet: non-splitty, easy to work with, and nice to the touch. It has a good weight and drape to it. Done in dc, with a sc edging. About 5" x 64". This is for my SIL.



The next scarf is made out of Bernat Harmony in Black. It is acrylic, because I think my brother is allergic to wool. Sc with a sc edging. This yarn was a bit splitty to work with. I found it a bit hard to see the stitches as I was working, but that is not a fault of the yarn. Simple and classic. About 9" x 49". For my brother.



I included the care instructions from the ball-band with each scarf. I hope they like them!

No time to talk...

Must crochet, crochet, crochet! WAAAAAAAAAA! Will post pics of fo's when I can, hopefully tomorrow.

Look what I woke up to today...

Snow!



It's not too cold, so I am sure it will melt soon. Still, it is kind of pretty!

Danger, Will Rogers, Danger!

WAAAAAAAAA! I am having to crochet some emergency Christmas gifts by, umm, SUNDAY! I am in super-crocheter mode. I am making a couple of scarves. The first one is in Bernat Bamboo in Corn. Mmmmmm, is it ever lovely! I think it will turn out beautiful. Have not yet started the other one. Must go back to crocheting!

Wordless Wednesday

Me and my hubby

My loving hubby took the week off! It is a nice surprise. My poor hubby certainly needs the break, as he has been working a ton of overtime since I have been off work. We have nothing planned except my regular appointments, so it will be nice just to be together. I love you honey!