Friday, February 16, 2007
So I learned yesterday that people with PTSD often have trouble with action. In other words, they have a harder than average time to actually do something. For my whole life, I have been a "planner" and not a "doer". I get stuck in the dreaming stage of a project. It is extemely hard for me to do some things, even if they are pleasing or enjoyable. So what Joann had suggested yesterday was to be gentle with yourself but do one thing per day. I thought to myself that surely I could do one thing I want or needed to do per day? So today I did two things! I walked on the treadmil for ten minutes. Now that doesn't sound like a lot, but to me just getting there and doing it was huge! The other thing I decided to do is to make some bread. It is in the oven right now and I hope it is tasty! Now, you're probably wondering why I can't just "do it". There is something in my brain that is so hard to overcome, it's like climbing Mount Everest in your undies. I just *can't*. But today I proved that I *can*. I'm sure I won't pick such difficult (for me) goals everyday, but I will do something everyday. I have already been good at doing something creative everyday, so I have proven I can do it. I just have to keep the momentum up. Wish me luck!