Wednesday, July 23, 2008

The dizzy speed of life is now making me sick

Ya know the previous post where I said I "was at peace"? Well that changed in a helluva hurry. Panic Panic Panic!!! And yup, it is making me feel like crap and now I can do even less. I am trying to take care of myself, but there is so much to do, I get so overwhelmed.

So how do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time. It's all I can do, except maybe drink. Does merlot go with elephant?

Monday, July 21, 2008

Whoa. Getting dizzy from the speed of life

So. (hmm... seem to be saying that a lot lately) Hubby is going to Grande Prairie to check his new job out. He leaves on Saturday and comes back early Tuesday morning. Flight booked, car rented, hotel booked; check, check, check. I've started on getting the house organized for moving and selling. Whoa.

With all the craziness going on, I feel strangely at peace and not panicky. I do as much as I can, and don't get upset if I can't do more. I really do feel this is *right* for us. It's all good!

Sunday, July 20, 2008

Changes they are 'a comin'

So. Life has all of a sudden started moving faster than light speed. Hubby sent out ONE resume out to Alberta, and got a job offer! Yay that he has a job! Not-so-yay that he starts in 4 weeks and I stay here to get the house ready to sell. Oof. I will so miss my hubby! I am a little concerned about doing everything here by myself, while still going to therapy as long as I can. Oh yeah, forgot to say that I don't drive! So getting things like groceries or packing boxes are that much harder to get without hubby. Oh yeah, and I am adjusting my meds. And I am worried about getting a therapist out there. Never mind I still have all the day-to-day issues of my PTSD to deal with too. And my laptop with all my bookmarks and documents isn't working correctly. *Sigh*

Tonight, I am going to take it easy and not do anything but watch tv and read. Tomorrow, I start the attack!

Monday, July 07, 2008

Travellin' and Cookin'

So, I don't get to travel as much as I'd like. I cook pretty well (as I am sure hubby would attest to). Anthony Bourdain gets to travel *and* cook. I always like to watch "No Reservations" on Mondays. I get to "get out of the house" for an hour a week, with a cynical chef as my travel guide. Today is the start of the new season, and can hardly wait to see what Tony has been up to in his travels. At least I am able to travel vicariously through him!

Sunday, July 06, 2008

What does it mean to be a woman?

Or feminine? These kind of thoughts have been on my mind a lot lately. I wouldn't exactly call myself "feminine"; I don't wear makeup or dresses. I wouldn't exactly call myself "masculine" though; I wear dangly earrings and have a pony tail.

So how do I define myself? I really don't know. In this society, it seems that "feminine" means makeup and high heels and flouncy outfits. Or to be a woman means being a mom or menstruating all the time (seems like it from the ads on tv for tampons). Sure, I get my period, but is that it?

I am so much more than "woman" or "feminine". I am an artist, a dreamer, a cook and a dog lover. I watch Formula 1 car racing, then watch Sewing with Nancy. I love computers and books. I garden and try to fix furniture.

So I am not too sure I will ever figure out how to be a "feminine woman". I am just me.

Tuesday, July 01, 2008

Been a long time gone...

I obviously haven't been keeping up with my blogging lately. There has been much going on in my personal life and I just haven't had the energy to write. For the past few days I suddenly had the urge to blog, and here I am!

My little shop on Etsy is growing very slowly. I haven't been working on it or promoting as much as I would like, but I hope shortly I will get back in the groove and get it going.

My hubby's job has been a big source of stress. Earlier this year, he was temporarily laid off for 9 weeks. He went back to work and we thought everything was going to be fine. However, a couple of weeks ago, he found out that he will be laid of permanently come September. Oof. Talk about major stress and worry! Because of the job situation here in Ontario, hubby is looking at maybe getting a job in Alberta. We've never been there, and the thought of moving right now truly terrifies me. I try and convince myself that if we have to move, it will be an "adventure". Sometimes that thinking actually works!

My medications for my PTSD are being changed around. I am now getting more symptoms of my PTSD being active, which is a bit unnerving. Hopefully things will get straightened out, and I will feel better soon.

So that is my life in a nutshell. Hopefully, dear reader, your life is going smoothly...