Holding pattern

So right now my life is in a bit of a holding pattern. Not much is going on, and I suppose that is ok. I've got Much Music Retro videos going on in the background; Gowan is on. Ooh! Flashback to the 80's!

I definitely feel like I am ready to go to work. I am bored out of my gourd at home! As scary as it will be to get a new job, I know I am ready for the challenge. Go go Gadget Anne!

Passion part 2

Today was a much better day than yesterday. After a little nap this afternoon, I got a whole bunch of stuff accomplished, including some art! See!
I love colour. Colour is often the first thing that draws me into a piece of art. I need to remember that art does not need to be "complicated" to be enjoyable.











There is something mystical about where inspiration and passion come from.





I want to learn more about colour theory. It is so much more than mushing colours together and hoping you get the colour you want.

Passion

It seems like there is a common theme in a lot of the blogs and websites I have been visiting lately; passion and how artists reconnect with their passion during the doldrums of winter. This made me think of my own passions and sources of said passions. So, instead of crocheting last night, I did some small scale art with the themes of passion. They aren't done yet, but as soon as they are, I'll post 'em here!

Today was just a quiet, napping kind of day. I did a touch of crocheting, but that is about it. I'm tired of being sore all the time (whine whine). Hopefully tomorrow is a better day!

Had a good day. Went for tea with my hubby and had a lovely time. Made peanut butter chocolate chip cookies while I was on the phone with Donna and Miz S (gotta love conference calls!). I am still planning to do a bit of crochet before I head off to dream land.

I have been thinking some lately about this blog and my goals/reasons for "doing" it. It certainly a helpful place to just dump the stuff clogging up my brain. I have been looking at a lot of different blogs and seeing what other people write. I know blogging is not a competition, but I feel my posts sometime lack the depth of thought that some other blogs seem to have. Maybe I'm just not a deep thinker! :D I guess I am just doing my own thang. I want this to be fun and not a chore. I'm just going to keep doing what I am doing, and as long as I am happy, that's all that is important. Sometimes it is important for me to realize it is ok for me to do what I want, how I want, and there is no right or wrong. It's ok for me to be me!

Friday, Friday...

Friday was ok. It was one of those "painful" kind of days, but I just went with the flow as much as possible. I had a good nap (or two).

I made a conscious effort to continue with my daily creativity plan. I decided to crochet today. I finished the third ball of yarn, and I did decide to repeat the central green colour. My blanket is really coming along. I am so proud!

Oooh! A GOOD day!

Today was, surprisingly, a good day. Busy, but good. I just feel hopeful and "up". It's surprising but refreshing.

Started a new group~~ this one is for PTSD. Sounds like it will be helpful and hopefully gentle. We will be doing homework every week (ugh) but I can handle that.

I went and got my hair done today. Had a great time and ended up with a cute cut!

I also did a little art. They are a little bigger than an ATC (each is 70mm x 120mm) but it was what I had so I worked with them. Yes, they are birds with fruit on their heads! A chicken with an apple and a bird with a pineapple.



It felt really good to draw a little bit. I hope I can keep the momentum and do a little art each day (ideally), but realistically maybe a few times a week.

It is a day...

Today was fine. Yes, just fine. I went to the dentist for a checkup and got a clean bill of health :D . I had a wonderful refreshing nap, and so I have been I feeling good this evening. Kinda happy, I have to admit. I start a new group tomorrow, as well as getting a hair cut.

I have been crocheting off and on. I am almost finished my third ball of yarn and I am hoping to get started on a new colour. I think I am going to repeat the central green colour around the outer edge. Not terribly creative, but I think it will look good. I feel proud that I am actually accomplishing something!

Life continues...

Same s#it, different day. I am having lots of body pain, but what can ya do? As much as I want to leave my future up to the Mahanta, it is really hard to let go. I am worried about getting a job. What if no one will hire me? I don't mind if it is not the best job in the world, but I would like one that I can be somewhat happy in. How can I work around the body pain? So many questions, and time is getting short.

Directionless

Today I just felt sorry for myself. It has been a rough day, physically and emotionally. I did make a yummy dinner: roast pork, veggies, mashed spuds and apple crisp for dessert.

I feel restless and unhappy. I just feel lost. I feel uncreative. I have been wandering around the internet, looking at blogs, trying to get inspired.

I am sending out a request: for guidance, for love, for a gentle helpful push, and for support. Hello? Is anyone listening?

Brain Dump

I have to really start figuring out my future, especially when it comes to a job. I just cannot go back to nursing; I will truly die inside if I do. What else can I do with my life? I am not trained for anything else. A min wage job seems like the most likely route for me. At least I can bring in a bit of money while I look for something better. I trust in the Mahanta that the right life will be mine.

I also need to take care of my body better. Exercise and food.

A tiny bud of excitment is growing inside me. A time of change is here. It feels like a sense of rightness, a warm sense of true-ness. I am scared shitless but am ready, I think for the first time in my life. I feel like I can control my life and not just let life push me about. I am ready to work with life.

Life

Lost
sorrow
wistful past

pain
emptiness
nothing but time

useless
crushed
frozen creativity

searching
seeking
blinded sight

torturous.

So, umm, yeah.

So. Yup. It's 2007 and I haven't posted for a while. What can I say? The holidays were good. New Year's came with no resolutions on my part. What I have been doing is crocheting. Yup. Crocheting a big granny square lap blanket out of Red Heart Super Saver (cheap and easy is how I like my yarn). Ya wanna see? I knew you would!